The Pattern is the Problem
A Life Pattern is a blind attachment to the image we have formed, received, had pushed on us, absorbed, and were trained to believe of ourselves. It's the picture of ourselves that we carry around in our head, and our entire way of thinking, emoting, speaking, and acting is rooted and deeply based on it.
But we resist the truth of this idea. The Pattern is deeply embedded in our psyche as a result of years of very emotional interpersonal interactions. It resists attempts to challenge and change and break through it. Initially, it's really difficult to hear that there may be a piece of us that contributed to whatever negativity we are experiencing in our lives and relationships. As a result, we often prefer to place responsibility for our situation on things and factors around us. When all we know ourselves to be is the image we have of ourselves, the idea of having to change threatens our identity. That's why we intensely defend ourselves and illogically hope that the others in our life will be the ones to change.
Have you ever deeply, strongly thought or believed something that you later came to realize was false?