Forget external validation! That's right. Here's what you do instead: validate yourself. And then...you'll really be able to connect to people.
When we’re locked into seeking external validation in order to feel good and feel ok and allowed to feel what we feel, it’s so hard to really hear people, share and connect. We’re too desperately locked into getting validated.
But as you grow and work on that, learning to validate yourself, and connect to and support your Child Self, you take that desperate-seeking-validation off the table. It's then that you're freed of emotional over-reactivity, and for the first time, truly able to tune into others.
Ever notice how you can be all wrapped up in what you feel and think, and what you want to say, while you're busy talking to a friend? Exactly.
As you validate, accept, and hear yourself, you'll become secure in the knowledge that you also get to have an opinion and feel what you feel. You'll be clear that hearing another person doesn’t snuff you out or block your right to feel and express yourself. You also get a turn.
Hear and be heard.